An Oldie But Goodie

This happened many years ago, but the story is just too damn good to be true. This is, hands down, the worst blind double date I have ever gone on (and yes, the only one.)

I had recently joined "the system" (aka Jdate) and had been emailing back and forth with this guy Jesus (fake names are being used for the protection of all involved.) Jesus and I were excited to meet, but given that I-dating was relatively new, we each agreed to bring along a single friend. What a bad idea that was.

Upon the four of us meeting at The Elephant (nice restaurant Jesus picked,) my friend S was appalled at the guy brought for her. As soon as we were seated, S would not engage in coversation with the friend, Keanu, which was quite awkward as Jesus and I were hitting it off. To make matters worse, S disappeared to "go to the bathroom" for about ten minutes. Within seconds of her return, the waitress delivered a bubbly, golden drink to S, courtesy of the guy she had picked up at the bar when she claimed to removing a bubbly, golden bodily fluid. Oy.

It gets worse. S had a good friend's 30th birthday which she did not want to miss, and dinner was running long. Rather than be late to the party, S was adamant about leaving the date. After all, we had eaten, although the check had not yet arrived. We offered Jesus and Keanu money, they declined, we thanked them and left.

The next day I felt awful about eating and running and sent Jesus an apology email. I also apologized for S's behavior. His reply was anything but forgiving. Jesus said, "If you really want to be sorry about something, here are the top 10 things you should be sorry for." I won't divulge the entire list, but rather #1- Not Dying.

There is a lesson to be learned here: don't order the duck. It gave me a stomachache. : )