Bad Day
I'm in the worst fucking mood today. It's only 11:42am, and I have been in this foul stinking mood since about 9:07am. At that time, I was supposed to be watching my friend Jessica's son get his little penis chopped, and instead, I was arguing with the 3rd Avenue bus driver. Can someone please explain why the HELL she was in the turn lane near 59th street, when she clearly should have gone to the left of those damn cones. I am not kidding- it took my over an hour to go 37 blocks, straight up 3rd Avenue. I know, I should have taken the subway, but since I live on 3rd Avenue, and was going straight up 3rd Avenue, and it was raining, I thought that was the driest, least smelly route. WRONG.
Once I got to the bris, the baby was already put to sleep in the other room. And I was surrounded by all couples, who had babies. I honestly wanted to end my life right there. This was my friend's second child. Everyone was talking about pre-school. Barf.
I lasted about 25 minutes, and then needed to get to work. I decided to take the subway this time, as my office is on Park Avenue. Again, I waited forever for public transportation, and the subway was crowded. Everyone was wet. Someone farted. Please, get me out of this misery.
Finally, I walked into the office, around 10:40, and have to work. I brought my office mate Tequila samples from Mexico and I think I am going to open one now.
Once I got to the bris, the baby was already put to sleep in the other room. And I was surrounded by all couples, who had babies. I honestly wanted to end my life right there. This was my friend's second child. Everyone was talking about pre-school. Barf.
I lasted about 25 minutes, and then needed to get to work. I decided to take the subway this time, as my office is on Park Avenue. Again, I waited forever for public transportation, and the subway was crowded. Everyone was wet. Someone farted. Please, get me out of this misery.
Finally, I walked into the office, around 10:40, and have to work. I brought my office mate Tequila samples from Mexico and I think I am going to open one now.
posted by Does Debbie @ 11:38 AM
2 Comments:
At 12:23 PM,
Chris said…
I feel your pain. Just about every Monday is bad for me, and when there is a holiday on Monday, it tends to be an even worse Tuesday. Whichever is the first day of the work week, that's the worst.
I locked myself out of the house yesterday morning in my sweatpants and t-shirt in a rushed attempt to get the garbage out to the curb in time. Then I lost a considerable amount of blood in the mother of all nosebleeds.
I thought it was over, but I guess it spilled into today when my laptop hard drive crashed. I've spent the last hour trying to rebuild it, and hope I didn't lose too much data.
One-upper [wun'-up-er] (noun): A person who belittles the experiences or knowledge of others by telling their own experiences (sometimes exaggerated) which are more drastic and extreme by comparison; a self-centered asshole who craves attention.
At 5:57 PM,
Anonymous said…
this is your office mate and she says "hands off my tequila!" :-)
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