Major Oops
So around Christmas time, a suitor from Boston, we'll call him The Patriot, noticed me online. More details about him another time, but what you need to know is that I met The Patriot for the first time for brunch two ago. He was in town visiting friends.
The Patriot came to town again this past weekend and we spent some time together. Driving range, mini golf, a meal. Good times. However, at one point he was in my apartment and I took advantage of him. No, no, no, I am not referring to anything sexual, rather I needed someone to help me "flip" my mattress. Since buying my amazing Queen size bed 2+ years ago, I don't think I have flipped it from head to toe to balance out the weight. Which means that there has been a major sag on one side.
The Patriot has big muscles so I assumed he was able to tackle the job. He grabbed the handles and within a minute the bed was almost rotated. However, after lifting the mattress up, he placed it down, and bent down. He grabbed between my bed and the mattress, and handed me something he had found on the ground.
A pair of men's XL Calvin Klein boxers.
Oh my god, I wanted to die. I was mortified. What was worse was that I had no idea whose they were. Not because I have had many men in my bed, but rather, because I actually have NOT had many men in my bed. Like two in the past two years. By the size, I assumed they were The Man's, but I honestly don't remember him ever owning Calvin Kleins. He always wore 2Xist, or at least that is what I recall.
I tried to make a joke about the situation. I mean, come on, how Sex and the City was that? Then I told him the only thing that really came to mind, "hey, at least I have a good story for my blog."
The Patriot came to town again this past weekend and we spent some time together. Driving range, mini golf, a meal. Good times. However, at one point he was in my apartment and I took advantage of him. No, no, no, I am not referring to anything sexual, rather I needed someone to help me "flip" my mattress. Since buying my amazing Queen size bed 2+ years ago, I don't think I have flipped it from head to toe to balance out the weight. Which means that there has been a major sag on one side.
The Patriot has big muscles so I assumed he was able to tackle the job. He grabbed the handles and within a minute the bed was almost rotated. However, after lifting the mattress up, he placed it down, and bent down. He grabbed between my bed and the mattress, and handed me something he had found on the ground.
A pair of men's XL Calvin Klein boxers.
Oh my god, I wanted to die. I was mortified. What was worse was that I had no idea whose they were. Not because I have had many men in my bed, but rather, because I actually have NOT had many men in my bed. Like two in the past two years. By the size, I assumed they were The Man's, but I honestly don't remember him ever owning Calvin Kleins. He always wore 2Xist, or at least that is what I recall.
I tried to make a joke about the situation. I mean, come on, how Sex and the City was that? Then I told him the only thing that really came to mind, "hey, at least I have a good story for my blog."
posted by Does Debbie @ 11:00 PM
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